Today

What an amazing day. In the afternoon a friend proposed to meet up in town in the evening and drink some wine but I told him I had to work in my shop to get things ready for tomorrow. Responsibilities. But I ended up drinking vermout in the shop with a customer, talking about how to grow wings. She wanted to buy my favorite piece, the one thing I don’t want to sell, but it made me think about letting go of things you love. And about how difficult it is to plan. And how THIS project is about exchange and meeting people more than it is about being a good artist preparing the perfect show. In the end it is about finding the right balance. About planning but being open to changes and look at your responsibilities from a different angle, find new ways to deal with them.

I love how all the clothing items seem to end up with the right people. I sold two pieces today, one I will have to choose myself for a person I never met but have been in touch with now and then in a wonderful way from a distance. She wrote me her measurements, length and weight, in inches and pounds. She described her body so I could make a right choice. When I converted the numbers I realised she has the same build I have.
Somebody else ordered the “one love” camouflage green shirt with a Bob Marley patch and a metal airplane sewed on its sleeve. It is something that is completely different from anything she wears but she told me she was attracted to it from the moment she saw it. I know her well. I think she made an excellent choice.
And if there is anybody I would want to sell my favorite jacket to, it is somebody who is keen on growing wings.

Earlier today one of my Facebook posts was temporarily removed because the original source got a warning from Facebook and was suspended because of another post and only moments later I received an e-mail from somebody asking me kindly to remove something from an old blogpost, because she didn’t like the information being out there in the virtual world. I cursed at Facebook and broke my head over my friend’s request. I don’t want to hurt peoples’ feelings but I also want to be free to bring out into the world what I find important.
In the morning I embroidered a memory that came back today, about a promise I broke. Sometimes it is hard to stick to your word. To decide what is the right thing to do. Be responsible or be happy? How do you find a way to be both?

I keep practising. By trying to do the right thing. By making mistakes. By letting go.
In my favorite jacket I embroidered this text: counting days, counting steps, loosing count, counting loss. Memories are reminders of things that have passed. They are a way of keeping in touch with those things, those moments. They tell us they were important because we remember them. Which doesn’t mean that the things we don’t remember weren’t important. By counting loss you also count your blessings. You count what you had the pleasure of spending time with. Or the fortune of having left behind you. And it is all in this jacket I can’t let go of for some reason. Letting go is the most difficult thing always. Another exercise in being here.

After I wrote this text I tried to find the photos I took from the jacket, to add them. Only now I see what is written on the label.